Tuesday, February 23, 2010

and there she is.......

and her name is Lexie.............LOL!!! My spitfire of a daughter!!! Who informed me that......................she can,she will and that is that!!! Love you my "baby girl" LOL!!

Saturday, February 20, 2010

The Birthday............

It was dusk, the sky was slightly overcast, the wind was blowing straight thru you, but there we where, the four of us,the mother,the father,the sister and the great grampy, we stood there in the wind,holding our hands,thinking of those who could not be there with us, thinking of his meme and grumpa who loved him deeply,his auntie and uncle who couldn't come to the birthday but loved him deeply too, thinking of his cousins who he never meet and who would have loved him, keeping hold of our gift to the son,little brother,great grandson,the boy, we stood there holding hands,while we all waited to give the gift, the gift of our love,the gift of releasing our love into the sky, hoping it would carry on to heaven,the only gifts we could give,the gift of words from the great grandfather who said the most important words I had heard all day!! About the boy, about how loved he was and still is,about the fact that he is in heaven and loved there just as much as he would have been here, how his great grandmother is holding him and loving him and looking after him as well as grandfather,his "Auntie" all his Great Grampies and Gramies,cousins,aunts,uncles everyone up in Heaven!! Then we let the balloons go,and they went,up into the wind that blew straight thru us, the big sister let them go, the big sister let them fly up into the wind straight to heaven as she cried out "Happy Birthday little brother, I miss you and I love you!" As the mother and father stood there and starred, starred at how grown up their seven and a half year old was..... at how much they wish life had been different....at how much they wish they could change.....and at ******HOW MUCH THEY CAN CHANGE IF THEY HAVE THE COURAGE TO TRY!!!!!*******

****It was the most beautiful birthday party I have ever attended!

Saturday, February 6, 2010

The Grave.............

I need to tell the story, I havne't told you'all the story, why? I havn't had the time, or maybe I just haven't taken the time, it is a story that I have told over and over for the last five years,it is a club I belong to, a club that I never thought I would earn a membership to, but yet I did, a club that dosn't cost money to join nor has an initation to complete, someday I will tell the story,the story about how I joined this club for no money and no initation,a club thru which I have meet some of the most amazing women in my life, but not today, today is the about the grave! The grave I need to go visit in a few days, the grave that is next to "his" great grammies grave who would have loved him so, the grave that has the most beautiful angel engraved on it, the grave that is mauveish in color, the grave that says "his" name, the gravestone that "his" great grampy purchased with love in "his" memory, the gravestone that I have not gone to visit with my daughter, the grave that my daughter goes to visit with her great grampy 3 or 4 times a week, the grave that I only visit alone,every few days on my way to work, the grave that has made me late to work before, the grave which I have shown off with pride,the grave says...."his" name, Anthony Douglas Montefesco, the grave that says February 10,2005, the grave that tells me it has been 5 years!! Five years!!!! The grave that says "he" existed, I love you with all my heart and will miss you always my son!!! We love you forever and ever, your mumma,sister,daddy,great grampy,meme,grumpa,your Aunts and Uncles, your cousins, your heavenly relatives! Everyone who know's us loves and miss's you!!!!!!!!

Rest in Peace my sweet little boy, rest in peace!!!!!!! your mumma loves and miss's you!